The result of a long car ride:

Isn’t love the ultimate expression of the fear of being alone?

Overactive brain is a symptom of an hour-long commute.

Planning to get your drink on? Well, unless you’ve got a few extra dollars to blow, don’t do it in Hawaii or Connecticut. The Hawaiian Senate recently approved a 50 percent increase in the state liquor tax, and Connecticut plans to do the same.

But it doesn’t stop there. At least nine other revenue-strapped states have proposed “sin taxes” to help balance their budgets. Other states thinking about making it more expensive to get sloshed include Alaska, Kansas, Nebraska, New Mexico, Oregon, South Carolina and Tennessee.

Republicans in Connecticut have denounced the proposed tax, calling it an attack on Joe Six-Pack. In fact, Heineken Milwaukee-Busch went so far as to call it an assault on the American way of life. “There are men across this great nation who hate their jobs and detest their wives. And now, we’re threatening to take away the only thing that helps them go to sleep at night and wake up in the morning,” Milwaukee-Busch said.

“Drinking brings men together and, sometimes, it brings men together with women no one would want to get together with unless they’d been drinking. It’s the natural way of things,” the true original Milwaukee-Busch continued. “This tax is a blight on the American way of life and threatens to destroy the very fabric of our lives.”

True. True.