Loser of the Week

From time to time, even the great ones make the dumbest mistakes. They make us mere mortals set aside our awe of their talent and laugh our collectives asses off.

I’m talking about athletes. Those people who are paid a huge sum of money and seem to have a life that us nine-to-fivers wish we could have a piece of.

Then, they do something completely stupid and we turn on them. We toss our arms up in confusion because we see the mistake coming and we realize they don’t see it coming. For an instant, we wish to scream out like they could hear us, but secretly, we are pleased that we are about to see one of these people, these overpriced talents, get completely owned on live TV. For a moment we relish - we savor - then we laugh like school boys.

This weekend, such an event took place. And event that defied common sense and turned one respected sportsmen into the joke of the week.

I’m talking about Swedish Formula 3000 driver Bjorn Wirdheim.

Sure, he’s not a household name, but let me tell you his story.

This weekend was the running of the Monaco Grand Prix. In the Formula 1 and Formula 3000 world, this is the piece d’resistance- the great race EVERY Formula driver wants to win. It’s the Indy 500 and the Daytona 500 wrapped up in one.

And for a Formula 3000 driver, it’s important. A win at Monaco is a boost to their resume. It can be the one solid entry that helps lift them to a Formula 1 ride.

That is, unless of mess it all up like Bjorn Wirdheim. Wirdheim is currently leading the Formula 3000 championship points race. So clearly, he’s doing something right. His stock in the Formula racing world is rising. Boy, it’d be nice to add a win at Monaco to his list of achievements…

He certainly started off on the right foot. After claiming pole position on Friday for the Monaco Grand Prix, Wirdheim totally dominated the race. In fact, he had a huge lead of 24 seconds by lap 35. It couldn’t get any better! The race was his, it was in his hands… until he got to the last 20 meters of the finish line.

You see, as Wirdheim was rounding the last few corners, he did something no one could explain - he slowed down. Bjorn Wirdheim slowed WAY down… to wave at his pit crew.

Nicholas Kiesa, running in second place, was a might bit shocked when he came around only to see Wirdheim meandering to and fro. So Nicholas Kiesa did what anyone would have done. He blew past Wirdeim as fast as he could and won the race, leaving Bjorn Wirdheim to wet his shorts as he realized what he did.

This would be like Tiger Woods leading the Masters by one stroke, then suddenly picking up his golf ball and pitching it into the drink for the fun of it.

At this point Bjorn Wirdheim could move on to become one of the greatest Formula 1 drivers in the history of the sport, but the announcer will always add, “Remember when he threw away Monaco in 2003 so he could wave?”

Cosbysweater
June 2nd, 2003 12:23 pm

Reminds me of the time Leon Lett started celebrating before he made it to the endzone. Big doofus.

Taranis
June 3rd, 2003 2:38 pm

I love it when he says he considers himself the moral victor. That’s what losers say.

Losers who suck eggs through garden hoses. People who celebrate like Abner Louima at a broom convention.

Cosbysweater
June 4th, 2003 11:04 am

Speaking of dumb mistakes, it looks like Sammy Sosa made a huge one last night. That is, of course, if you believe it was just a mistake.

I tend to believe that he never intended to use the corked bat in a game. Why would he? The guy routinely goes yard more than most guys strike out. That, and he seemed genuinely upset by the whole thing.

Too bad this is going to now be with him forever because there’s always going to be a few people who wonder if his many homers came from corked bats.

Jetteva
June 4th, 2003 11:13 am

Not to mention Corky Henderson. Everyone will wonder if that hot dog eating contest was in question because his name is Corky.

Don’t get me started on Corky Romano.

Taranis
June 4th, 2003 12:13 pm

Ugh.