Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

– Ed Gardner

Just returned from seeing the latest incarnation of Batman. I am absolutely floored. The film strikes the perfect tone. While it strays slightly from the continuity of Batman’s origins that I am familiar with, it rests firmly on the strength of a great story. The script and plot keep the movie fresh, original and engaging.

Let’s not count out some fantastic acting and cameos. Christian Bale as Batman is so perfectly two-faced and conflicted about his role in the world. The pain and catharsis are physical torments for him as an actor and it is a delight to see them play out on the screen. Michael Caine, Rutger Hauer, Gary Oldman, and Morgan Freeman bring a gravitas to the film that is simply remarkable. They make it believable and likable as their abilities to be real and fully developed keep them from being simple bit roles for a smile.

The love story is a bit dull but thankfully it takes up only a little time on the screen and is handled well when it raises its head. Some people might be frustrated that the Bat doesn’t even come in until the last half of the film, but it is that precise fact that had me loving the movie. It is based on the development of a character with a psyche, a soul, and a reason for his actions. The first half of the film tells the most interesting tale of Batman: why does he do it?

From top to bottom the movie is a pleasure. The production design is perfect, casting is great, and the performances are thoroughly enjoyable. The only issue I might have for the film is that while Christopher Nolan has a great sense of pace and plot, his action sequence directing is sometimes overly choppy and confusing as I lost track of just who was hitting whom and where they were in space. In some scenes, this was clearly intentional, but not in all of them.

At the end of the film, the audience roared with applause and I think that it was well deserved. This movie sets the bar even higher from where X-Men 2 left the superhero film world. Some will argue that Sin City was a better comic book film than this, but I think that the comparison is extremely difficult to make considering the absolutely overwhelming history and cultural knowledge that’s out there about Batman that the filmmakers had to deal with. They simply have different goals and live in different worlds.

I do have one caveat. There were many children under the age of 13 in the theater with me. While there is no cussing or sex and the violence is mostly of the martial arts variety, there are some fairly frightening scenes, especially with the Scarecrow, that might not be appropriate for the younger children who might be interested.

It seems that the mainstream press couldn’t any more info on Michael or the missing girl in Aruba and decided to tackle this whole Downing Street issue. A story has finally appeared on CNN where it seems that the Democratic Forum has gotten enough coverage of the topic to warrant a story.

Interestingly, near the end they mention another Sunday Times article, writing:

The Sunday Times also reported on an eight-page briefing paper prepared for Blair which concludes that the U.S. military has given “little thought” to the aftermath of a war in Iraq.

The briefing paper of July 21, 2002 says that a postwar occupation of Iraq could lead to a protracted and costly nation-building exercise and that “as already made clear, the U.S. military plans are virtually silent on this point. Washington could look to us to share a disproportionate share of the burden.”

I’m glad to see that finally some Americans will get to hear some semblance of the truth about our reigning despot, the boy king.

Children of the 80s can rejoice. Teddy Ruxpin is back. And this time, he’s packing MP3 cartridges instead of cassette tapes. Reports claim the 80s toy icon, unfortunately, will not include “I’m Teddy Ruxpin, beeyotch!” among his recorded phrases.

The Toledo Blade reported today that Tom Noe, the man behind a missing $12 million Ohio Bureau of Workers’ Compensation rare coin investment, has a history of trying to broker shady business deals. Apparently, while chairman of the Ohio Board of Regents, which, among other duties, coordinates and implements Ohio higher education policies, Noe decided to invest in a company founded by a University of Toledo professor and attempted to “improperly influence” the university. And the hits just keep on coming.

Finally a smart spin-off idea from Hollywood. Looks like Hugh Jackman will reprise his Wolverine role and produce a movie of the same name. With quite possibly the best backstory of all comic book heroes, this was a definite no-brainer. Here’s hoping they don’t water down what we saw in the comics.

May we all pause for a moment of falsetto singing, crotch grabbing, and moonwalking to celebrate yet another famous person’s defeat of the legal system. Let us sing, “hee-hee!”

The only way I could make this any more clear is to write it on the wall behind me.

In a past post, I pointed out Amazon’s secret porn stash. I encourage you to read that post, or this one may not mean much.

Us Llama’s are nothing if not diligent. We have uncovered yet another stash of adult products.

So here is your SpittingLlamas challenge. Let’s find as much porn on Amazon and create a list here in our post comments. After we get a good list, I’ll create a SpittingLlamas Listmania Amazon List so this stash will be hidden no longer.

If the United States government under its current administration discovered the secrets of time travel, what is the first thing they should do in the past and, taken separately from the effect this would have on the present, what is the first thing they should do in the future? What do you think they’d actually do?